[ It's complicated to explain what kind of feeling it gives to her knowing such thing. She's happy, as she should be, that he could live such peaceful and happy years after the war. That he could pass away in such beautiful way with the people he cared in that moment. It was something to be envious for, wanting to end one's life in that manner.
Yet, a tiny part of her... She feels bad knowing that Ilya will still have to suffer the Fifth Holy Grail War. That she.. Her future... She wanted to avoid her that suffering. Being told once again that she failed to protect her daughter like that still hurts her, but Irisviel is strong enough to not show that to Shirou. ]
I'm so happy that he had such a peaceful and happy smile on his face...
[ She trails off, imagining such face. A face she would have loved to see. ]
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Yet, a tiny part of her... She feels bad knowing that Ilya will still have to suffer the Fifth Holy Grail War. That she.. Her future... She wanted to avoid her that suffering. Being told once again that she failed to protect her daughter like that still hurts her, but Irisviel is strong enough to not show that to Shirou. ]
I'm so happy that he had such a peaceful and happy smile on his face...
[ She trails off, imagining such face. A face she would have loved to see. ]