route_1065 | Because I screwed it up before. Oops :|

Who: Edward Elric and anyone who wants to ~~troll~~ meet him.
Where: New Bark Town
When: Late morning
Summary: POOF! Ed arrives in Johto and is really just trying to find out what the hell's going on. (Ed's starter is a Pichu.)
Rating: pg-13 for Ed's potty mouth.
Log:

Ed turned off the communication devise. If circumstances had been different, he'd be really interested in the thing that was a mix between a phone and what seemed like a bunch of other things. But now, he had other things that were a bit more important to pay attention to.

Ed stood up and walked over to the Pichu, giving it a look that made it obvious that Ed wanted nothing to do with it. The Pichu glared back, charging it's cheeks up again, but only letting a few sparks run across it's body, as if daring the human in front of it to try to touch it. "Looks like I'm really stuck with you, huh?" The Pokemon continued to just stare. Ed sighed. No one would ever learn of this. The only one who knew about this that he knew was Envy, and he didn't care about him in the first place. No one back home would know that he caved in...to a mouse.

Ed crouched down and held out his hand. "Hey, sorry about-"

ZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP

"GAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! YOU LITTLE SHIT! I WAS APOLOGIZING!"

"Pichu!"

"Hey, I don't like this any more than you do, so how about we just go downstairs and get food without killing each other?"

Ed stood up and walked out of the bedroom, the Pichu following, but seemingly against its will. He trampled down the stairs to find a woman at the kitchen sink washing dishes. She turned and looked at Ed, a smile beaming on her face. "It's about time you woke up. You're breakfast is cold."

No way. Envy couldn't be serious. His mom was dead. He had been at the funeral. He had lost his left leg trying to resurrect her with alchemy!

The woman put the last dish on the drying rack. "Ed, I have to go out and tend to the garden. Professor Elm wanted to talk to you, so hurry up and eat before you go see him, ok?"

"Wait, who are-" Before Ed could finish the sentence, she had walked out the back door. He looked down at the yellow rodent. It glared back up at him. Grumbling, Ed left the meal on the table and walked out the front door. Maybe this Professor would know what the hell was going on...

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"Some guy named Maes Hughes. Know him?"

Envy's tone was semi-infuriatingly pleasant now, with an edge to it. He'd figured out that in his future he's the one who kills the guy, but more importantly he'd figured out that Ed you little bastard you told people about what happened in Lab 5, who else did you tell?

"Although I guess you must, considering he knew about us homunculi." Envy's glare wasn't visible over the audio, but oh it's there.

Ed's face was wearing a similar expression, though he didn't know it. "How the hell do you expect me to believe that?! Hughes is dead!"

Ed wanted nothing more than to beat that thing up into a bloody pulp. He ignored Envy's last comment. A lot of people knew about the homunculi now, so what did it matter to him?

"Just tell me what you want then shut up." Ed didn't have to listen to this bullshit. He could just hang up, but Envy had to have called him for a reason other than pissing him off. Well, he had better have a better reason.

"Yeah I know he is, he told me. You can believe me or not, I don't really care. But people show up here that were dead in their worlds all the time."

Well maybe not all the time, but enough that it wasn't an isolated case. But if Ed knew about Hughes being dead, then that meant he was from Envy's future too. Figured. And as for what he wanted...really, he had just been looking to piss Ed off. And if Ed was from the future, then--

"Thing is, he isn't dead in the time I'm from. I'd have known about it." Because Envy'd supposedly killed him. Not that he was going to let Ed know this, and he'd lie if asked. "So what I want to know is, what was happening when you got pulled here? Besides Gluttony eating me, which is ridiculous."

How do you respond to that? Envy knew Hughes was dead because Hughes told him? How the hell did that work? And people being pulled from different points of the timeline...different worlds even...

Ed looked down at his Pichu, and it looked back up at him with a concerned look on it's face. The fact that that thing existed was a mystery, yet there it was. Ed didn't have any kind of grasp on how any of this crap was possible, but then, he was also realizing that maybe all this isn't as far-fetched as he might think.

"You were there to stop Gluttony from eating me and Al, but you were stupid and told him to eat Ling, and also spat out the nice little fact that you guys don't want me or Al to die, so we started fighting and it looked like Gluttony ate us. Well, maybe not Al, but definitely you, me, and Ling."

Sure, Ed could have lied, but then Envy probably would have a hard time figuring that out. Plus, there could be a clue somewhere as to how to get back to where they came from. Even if it was a slight chance, it was worth it. He couldn't leave Al by himself...

It took Envy a minute after Ed finished talking to say anything, because what Ed was saying made almost less sense than he knew what he'd been saying probably made to Ed. There was no way Gluttony would eat him, and where was Lust? She must have been there if Gluttony was there. And not wanting Ed to get killed, yeah they weren't really supposed to, but if he got to be too much trouble Envy certainly wouldn't have held back; they could always find another alchemist to create the Stone. And then there was the biggest issue with Ed's story.

"If Gluttony ate you, you're dead. And he couldn't have eaten me because I'd be able to stop him before he finished his first bite. It's not like he can eat anyone accidentally. Don't try to feed me such stupid lies."

Even saying that, he knew that Ed didn't sound like he was lying. This was quickly turning into a headache. Johto barely made sense, but home should at least.

"If you don't want to believe me, then that's your problem." It really was. Ed honestly didn't give a horse's ass about what Envy thought.

"Are you going to let me hang up, or are you going to waste more of my time?" Talking to Envy wasn't very enjoyable. That, and he had more important things to do, like to find a way back home and teach his Pokemon to control it's powers so it didn't accidentally kill him.

Because I screwed it up before. Oops :|

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