You have no chance to survive

[these_balls]

Who: Rocket Grunts, Magma Grunts, and Aqua Grunts! Basically all the Grunts!
Where: The Whirl Islands and Cinnabar Island
When: February 1st
Summary: Pretty much this
Rating: PG-13? It doesn't need to higher than that? Right, guys?
Log:

The orders are pretty simple. Go in. Wipe out the Team Aqua and Magma Grunts. That's it. So there's not going to be any farewell speeches or anything like that from the Admins because they're of the opinion that you guys have totally got this.

And if you don't...

Well, don't worry about that for now.

Instead, just worry about getting to the nearest base and boarding a helicopter. After that, you've got a short (or long, depending on which base you're heading to) ride ahead of you to some islands in the middle of the ocean, inhabited by a bunch of Aqua and Magma Grunts who have no idea this surprise is on the way. So just do what you do best, Rockets!

And as far as the Admins are concerned what you do best should be to win at all costs. Anything less and well, that would just be an embarrassing return to the region for them. And nobody wants that.


QUICK LINKS
EVENT INFO | QUESTIONS | PLOTTING POST

☆ HELICOPTER RIDE THREAD ☆ TEAM AQUA BASE THREAD ☆ TEAM MAGMA BASE THREAD ☆ AFTERMATH THREAD

Comments

[whos_that]

It sure doesn't get there fast enough to avoid Discharge. Or to avoid being paralyzed. Wow. It's still going to try and land Poison Fang though.

And then on the next turn...

“Whatever! It sounded better than what you said! Golbat, use Confuse Ray!”

Nope! It's fully paralyzed!

[ajustcaws]

Poison Fang lands, and from the way it looks, Thunderhoof... might've gotten a little bit of that venom, huh... but she can't worry right now! There's an opening!

"It totally didn't! Anyway, you're going down here! Thunderhoof, Wild Charge!"

...Even though Thunderhoof is starting to look a little woozy, she begins crackling with electricity and charging at the Golbat, aiming to slam right into it.

[whos_that]

Wow, that had to have completely sucked for everyone involved but it especially sucked for Golbat. Its health is definitely in the red so one more good hit like that and it's done for. But until then, she'll try and stay on the offensive to keep from being in that situation.

“It totally did! Anyways, Golbat, Bite!”

And Golbat's swooping forward trying to make Thunderhoof flinch! Oh no!

[ajustcaws]

"If you think that, you're in for a shock!" said Cynthia with a fistpump. That... yeah, okay, Thunderhoof gets hit by it, and between that, the recoil, and being poisoned she's a little worse for wear.

Nevertheless, she isn't flinching, so...

"Let's just go with Spark!"

...there's not much distance to close there, but maybe she'll miss?

[whos_that]

She doesn't! Golbat faints!

“Will you quit with that?”

Out comes...a level 36 Camerupt!

“Rock Slide! Better quit while you're ahead or you'll get buried by the full power of Team Magma!”

Oh no, it is in fact apparently contagious. This could be bad.

[ajustcaws]

Thunderhoof is level 80 so that doesn't hurt quite that much... but oh no, that Toxic effect seems to have taken its toll, so Thunderhoof starts slumping a bit shortly after that...

"No! I'm never going to stop! ...Thunderhoof, you can come back, because I've got a better idea here!"

...Cynthia had thought Team Aqua was pretty cool, so she was going to completely unintentionally take a page out of their book by sending out a level 47 Sharpedo.

"All right, Windwave! Let's go with Aqua Jet to show them that they're all washed up!"

[whos_that]

...wait.

Sharpedo?

Aqua Jet?

Okay, that's just going to far.

“How dare you break into our base and start using our rivals' strategy and Pokemon. Team Magma's not going to let you get away with that! Camerupt use-”

Unfortunately, whatever tirade she was about to go on was cut short by that shark slamming into her poor Camerupt. Wow.

“Retaliate with Take Down!”

There we go. Something. Odds are it'll faint from the recoil either way, so there'll be a level 10 Poochenya on the field for Sharpedo to deal with after that.

[ajustcaws]

"Wait, really?" said Cynthia, blinking and looking genuinely a bit shocked before grinning. "Hah, that's almost better! Those Team Aqua guys have some style!"

...she wasn't really doing herself any favors, but neither was Camerupt. Take Down combined with Rough Skin... yeesh. And while Windwave is shaken, he's still going, but...

Oh. He's just... gonna kind of look at that little hyenadog, then look back at Cynthia. He's Gentle natured, why would you do this...?

Cynthia... also kind of grimaces a bit.

"Uh... are you sure you don't just... want to give up now?"

[whos_that]

“No way! Team Magma never surrenders!”

After all, what would Maxie say? ...other than probably just lineface at them for bringing underleveled Pokemon to fight Team Rocket.

“Poochenya! Use Tackle!”

Better do something quick Cynthia because that tiny dog is racing right for Windwave.

[ajustcaws]

"But this doesn't feel heroic at all!" said Cynthia, sounding somewhat distressed. "Um... uh... Swagger, I guess?"

...that would make it feel less hideously unfair, although that might just cause the poor dog to hurt itself.

...like it does when it tackles Windwave due to Windwave's Rough Skin.

Does this work for winning in a hilarious way?

[whos_that]

Rough Skin definitely hurts Poochenya and now it's confused. Okay. She's stillgot this. She knows what to do here.

“Poochenya, use Roar! Get rid of that shark!”

Poochenya used Roar! The wild Team Magma Grunt fled!

Wait, what?

Thanks to its confusion, it's currently chasing its trainer down the hall away from Cynthia and her pet shark. Looks like this one counts as a Team Rocket win.

YES THIS IS BEAUTIFUL

[ajustcaws]

...

Cynthia stared.

Windwave also stared.

"Uh... well, a victory's a victory! Gold star Windwave!" she said, striking a pose and after a somewhat confused silence. "Come on, let's keep on going and see if we can take anyone else on!"

And off she went, humming a little victory tune as her Sharpedo lagged behind her a bit, still very confused by the whole thing.