Who: ANYONE AND EVERYONE Where: ANYWHERE AND EVERYWHERE When: May 29 - 31 Summary: GET IN HERE AND MINGLE Rating: BUT PLEASE MARK YOUR THREAD CONTENT ACCORDINGLY Log:
[... background? What kind of background? There's a mildly concerned look on Kouta's face that Micchy is hiding something else from him, combined with the hurt he's feeling from hearing Micchy talk about this. But it's all a distraction from the main point he's trying to make.]
Micchy. Answer me.
[He shakes his friend a little bit for emphasis.]
What I did to Yuuya... What I couldn't stop from happening to Hase... Do you think I deserve to live the rest of my life being punished for that?
[He flinches at the shaking, and lets out a slightly annoyed sigh.]
No. ... But you're different. Things seem to go well for you, but it's not your responsibility to deal with the burden of decisions. It's mine, because it's my burden to deal with the unpleasant things by virtue of where I was born. You get to make your decisions, and I'm supposed to dive in and make the hard ones that put blood on my hands that I can't wash off.
With Yuuya, with Hase... it's not your fault because you didn't know. I should have known. I should have found things out earlier. I should have pressed everyone I could for information. You... you don't seem to understand. What happened to the two of them is unfortunate - but it's my responsibility to deal with the dirty work. You can be the knight in shining armor, and I deal with the unpleasant parts. I can't...
... I can't turn away from my responsibility. The duty of those higher in station to protect those lower in station. I loved dancing with you... but I wasn't doing what I should do to protect you.
[There's that thing again... He's heard everything Micchy has to say and has plenty to say in response, but it's all centered around something he can't quite understand.]
Higher station? ... what are you talking about, Micchy?
[That's... ... oh. Oh. The gears obviously turn in Kouta's head before his eyes widen and he perks up, staring at Micchy in shock. He'd just spoken to Takatora not too long ago, after the other had seemed like such a horrible person at first. ... and his attempts on Kouta's life, but now he was an ally of theirs. Or at least Kouta liked to think so.]
The white armored Rider? The one who works at Yggdrasil is your brother?
[That last name means nothing to him at the moment, it seems.]
Kouta just stares blankly at first, tries to speak, fails miserably, then opens his mouth to speak again.]
... so your family runs Yggdrasill?
[It's certainly sounding like it. Kouta had some sneaking suspicions that Takatora had a lot of ties, with all the authority he seemed to carry, coupled with being a Rider. If Yggdrasill was behind the Riders, it would make sense for them to have some of their own, more than just the one who helped protect Ryouma.
It changes things a lot to know this and he can understand why Micchy never told them, especially with how much people tended to hate Yggdrasill, but...
Kouta goes silent for a bit, trying to think of what to say.]
I guess it makes sense, how you feel like you should have known more, how you should have been the one to protect us. Takatora... and you... You guys had a pretty big weight on your shoulders, huh? ... I can't even think of what it must have been like for you guys, knowing these things and having to hide them. Knowing you might not be able to save everyone.
[He flexes his fingers at his side.]
I don't expect you to get better all at once. Maybe you'll never get better, but you're not Mitsuzane in this world. You don't have to worry about saving us anymore. You don't have to follow orders from anyone. ... so I don't want to see you build a cage around yourself and lock your heart away. You were such a good friend to all of us. People deserve the pleasure of being your friend.
[He nods a bit, though at the part about him not having to follow orders, he laughs quietly.]
There's people I have to take orders from here... but yes. It's not the same here. People don't care where you came from. No one knows your family or your background. ... But it's not exactly easy to just say that you're going to change just because your world has.
I've been told my whole life that my power and station means nothing if I don't use it to protect those below me. ... But here, I'm near the bottom. I've been... trying to help people like I think you would, but... it's not exactly natural for me.
[He can say these things out loud here. It's fine. It's not like Kouta will stay past these few days if this is the same thing as the last.]
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no subject
Micchy. Answer me.
[He shakes his friend a little bit for emphasis.]
What I did to Yuuya... What I couldn't stop from happening to Hase... Do you think I deserve to live the rest of my life being punished for that?
no subject
No. ... But you're different. Things seem to go well for you, but it's not your responsibility to deal with the burden of decisions. It's mine, because it's my burden to deal with the unpleasant things by virtue of where I was born. You get to make your decisions, and I'm supposed to dive in and make the hard ones that put blood on my hands that I can't wash off.
With Yuuya, with Hase... it's not your fault because you didn't know. I should have known. I should have found things out earlier. I should have pressed everyone I could for information. You... you don't seem to understand. What happened to the two of them is unfortunate - but it's my responsibility to deal with the dirty work. You can be the knight in shining armor, and I deal with the unpleasant parts. I can't...
... I can't turn away from my responsibility. The duty of those higher in station to protect those lower in station. I loved dancing with you... but I wasn't doing what I should do to protect you.
no subject
Higher station? ... what are you talking about, Micchy?
no subject
You... ah. ... My full name is Mitsuzane Kureshima. You might know my brother... Takatora Kureshima.
no subject
[That's... ... oh. Oh. The gears obviously turn in Kouta's head before his eyes widen and he perks up, staring at Micchy in shock. He'd just spoken to Takatora not too long ago, after the other had seemed like such a horrible person at first. ... and his attempts on Kouta's life, but now he was an ally of theirs. Or at least Kouta liked to think so.]
The white armored Rider? The one who works at Yggdrasil is your brother?
[That last name means nothing to him at the moment, it seems.]
no subject
[He reaches up and tucks his hair back behind his ears, trying to regain some sort of dignity.]
no subject
Kouta just stares blankly at first, tries to speak, fails miserably, then opens his mouth to speak again.]
... so your family runs Yggdrasill?
[It's certainly sounding like it. Kouta had some sneaking suspicions that Takatora had a lot of ties, with all the authority he seemed to carry, coupled with being a Rider. If Yggdrasill was behind the Riders, it would make sense for them to have some of their own, more than just the one who helped protect Ryouma.
It changes things a lot to know this and he can understand why Micchy never told them, especially with how much people tended to hate Yggdrasill, but...
Kouta goes silent for a bit, trying to think of what to say.]
I guess it makes sense, how you feel like you should have known more, how you should have been the one to protect us. Takatora... and you... You guys had a pretty big weight on your shoulders, huh? ... I can't even think of what it must have been like for you guys, knowing these things and having to hide them. Knowing you might not be able to save everyone.
[He flexes his fingers at his side.]
I don't expect you to get better all at once. Maybe you'll never get better, but you're not Mitsuzane in this world. You don't have to worry about saving us anymore. You don't have to follow orders from anyone. ... so I don't want to see you build a cage around yourself and lock your heart away. You were such a good friend to all of us. People deserve the pleasure of being your friend.
no subject
There's people I have to take orders from here... but yes. It's not the same here. People don't care where you came from. No one knows your family or your background. ... But it's not exactly easy to just say that you're going to change just because your world has.
I've been told my whole life that my power and station means nothing if I don't use it to protect those below me. ... But here, I'm near the bottom. I've been... trying to help people like I think you would, but... it's not exactly natural for me.
[He can say these things out loud here. It's fine. It's not like Kouta will stay past these few days if this is the same thing as the last.]