Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock

[matini]

Who: Homestuck cast (sob too many to list)
Where: Somewhere in Goldenrod City that can handle all these chillens
When: Christmas Day
Summary: Christmas Shenanigans with any and all Homestucks!
Rating: C for Cute, M for the mouths of Striders because DANG, YOU GUYS. WASH YOUR MOUTHS.
Log:

Comments

[timelymaid]

You're still eating something substantial, though! Not just candy and cookies.

[ Because apparently she's playing lusus, who knows. ]

[viiru2alert]

Goddamnit.

[Because apparently he was hoping to distract her with happiness so he could grab more unhealthy junk.]

Okay, Megidomom, what should I eat?

[timelymaid]

[ Nice try, Captor. Well, she'll give you time to take off your coat, but then they're on the way to the kitchen. ]

I knew it! Sollux, you really have to eat better. Look, I'll make you a sandwich, and there's a vegetable platter, so you're definitely having some of those. [ AND YOU WILL LIKE - well okay he might not like it but it's good for him so there. ]

[viiru2alert]

[Sollux takes a carrot off the platter and stuffs it in his mouth.] There. Now I've had some. Carry on.

[timelymaid]

"One" is not equivalent to "some"!

[ So you'd better rethink that while she gets started putting together a plate that is Megido Approved. ]

[viiru2alert]

[Nom.]

There.

I'm not going above two.

[timelymaid]

Two celery, too, then!

[ If Karkat saw this he would laugh. ]

[viiru2alert]

[If anyone saw this they would laugh.]

[Sollux eats the celery with one hand and flips Aradia off with the other.]

[timelymaid]

[ She doesn't even care, because he ate it. Success!

And the plate might have broccoli on it, but there is also a sandwich with as many quasi healthy fillings as she thought she could get away with. And a snowman cookie. ENJOY.

She made herself a sandwich, too, so they can exit to the less-crowded living room to eat. ]

[viiru2alert]

[He briefly debates eating the snowman cookie first, but since Aradia is still there and he probably isn't going to get much more of them, he holds off. He's going to enjoy that snowman cookie, okay.]

...I gotta say. You're pretty good at making sandwiches.

[timelymaid]

[ Sollux wins points for not going with the cookie first. It was a test! ...Okay, no it wasn't, but she's proud of him anyway. ]

They're quick to make, so I've had a lot of practice, especially recently. I'm also good with trail mix? Although that's more, well, mixing stuff up. And not making anything.

[viiru2alert]

Trail mix doesn't count, sorry. You just dump things in a bowl and pour salt all over them. [Nomnomnom.] Huh, it's quieter in here, isn't it? ...Well. Marginally. [He looks back at the other room, where the rest of them have now proceeded to play thumping music that can be heard from all the way in here. Sollux has to wonder, vaguely, what time it is.]

[timelymaid]

It counts when you want to eat trail mix! [ On the trail! You know, like they usually are. ] Well, almost everyone's in the other room. [ Aradia's been eating whenever Sollux talks, so she's just fiddling with her plate right now, glancing at the other room. ] I think tomorrow's probably going to be a little awkward for some people.

[viiru2alert]

Why would anyone ever want to eat trail mix over anything else? Like, "Oh, jeez, today I feel awful peckish for some reason, let me consume specifically this pitiful mixture of ground nuts and processed chocolate!" It's just there.

[ ... ]

You know, yeah, it probably is.

People're going to be waking up on top of other people in a heap on the floor. Mess.

[timelymaid]

It's something quick you can eat on the go! But okay, point taken, I'll never offer you any.

Well, there's that. There's also the part where I'm fairly certain the punch has soporifics in it, and there's that dead human plant everywhere. [ And she's pretty certain there are a few drunk humans. It's slightly worrying. ]

[viiru2alert]

Everything about this human holiday is weird.

[Good thing he didn't drink anything that wasn't bottled or canned so far.]

[timelymaid]

I don't see why there are so many dead plants involved, but John said it's because of Europeans?

[viiru2alert]

No idea what those are, but fuckin' Europeans.

[timelymaid]

I think they're sort of a different blood caste. Our humans are "Americans".

[viiru2alert]

Huh. I thought humans didn't have blood castes.

[timelymaid]

It's not a blood caste, that's just the closest I can figure it as. They're apparently different somehow, anyway. [ Somehow. ] Although the Bro human lusus was telling me that human males go through life stages that involve being a frat boy, and...things.

[viiru2alert]

So their intelligence actually does decrease as they get older. The more you know, I guess.

[timelymaid]

Was that remark meant to be about Striders or human males in general? Because I hate to point it out, but you're the latter right now.

[viiru2alert]

Yes, but I wasn't a human originally so it's not my fault and absolutely no one can blame me.

[timelymaid]

I sort of like it! I can see why Kanaya enjoyed being outside in the daytime.